magical stardust ☺
J.
"an attempt to make sense of and articulate the thoughts running through my head."
♥ bold italic strikeout underline♡
TAGBOARD.
PEEKTURES.
|
|
end.
Its gonna be 2011 in about 90mins, and actually I feel that apart from the crazy A Level madness towards the end of the year, 2010 has been quite a great year.
I remember how apprehensive I was about going into 2A02 'alone' since there were only 4 people from my ex class in 2A02, and the one I was most comfortable with had her best friend from another class in this new class too, and I wasn't close to the other 2.
I remember how bad the first few days were and how damn badly I missed Shawn and Regina during that period.
But as time went by, I was grateful to be in 2A02, cause I made awesome new friends, and realized how caring and dedicated our tutors were.
Enjoyed myself during CNY cause for the first time in idk how many years, I went for my maternal family gathering. Not with my family though, but I really had a great time. Plus my cousin's wedding in the midst of CNY, awesome fun. (:
Scaled Mount Ophir, had Great Hike 2010, tons of fun. Seriously, ODAC made my life in SR alot better. Imagine if I didn't quit Council -.-"
Ran 15km for WillRun, blood blister appeared, gross max. Ran in the Nike Run 2010 without training, made it in the end (Y)
Studies wise, yeah, ups and downs, but I improved gradually. Did stupid things like go for 6 hours worth of papers without a single wink of sleep during Prelims, and I regretted it afterwards cause of the rubbish I wrote on both my Math and History scripts UNKNOWINGLY.
That madness aside, I found studying more fulfilling this year, partly cause I think I took greater pride in my studies this year as compared to all the rubbish I did in 2009. And for some weird reason, I enjoyed studying! Hahaha.
Fell sick in the midst of the Prelims, studying routine screwed, but it was nothing compared to the saga that took place 2 weeks before A's, spanning a period of 5 freaking days. Worst illness ever, before the most important thing ever.
But its through times like these that allows you to realize who your true friends are.
I've never really received so much attention like that before, and I was touched, really (:
After these 2 years, I realized why people say that your secondary school friends are the one who'd stay by you always. Not that JC friends don't. Made alot of new friends this year, and they made my year awesome.
To everyone who made my year such a great one, thank you.
P.S. This includes people like Eric Hobsbawm, A.D. Smith, Sukarno, Suharto, U Nu, Ne Win, Gorbachev, Stalin, Aung, Saya San, Joseph Schumpeter, Harvey Levinstein, Oscar Wilde, Emily Bronte, Jeanette Wineterson..
(okay that was a long list. Esp the History bit. I could go on for ages omg hahaha.)
|
|
just because.
Dear mummy and daddy, thanks for not telling me that you two were going for Watch Night Service, really.
Not like i didn't ask. yes, at that point in time you were unsure, but at least have the courtesy to tell me that you guys were going?
much love,
jessica
Nice end to 2010 huh, realizing what kind of people my parents are.
Plus recently I realised how damn freaking bloody sly the two of them can be.
Eye-opener, really. Esp since I thought it was getting better.
After finally getting me my iPhone after dragging since my contract ended early last month, they told me that i had to clear my room that night ONLY after paying, else they'd confiscate my phone.
me: huh i'm working tmr!
daddy: too bad, you can stay up until 3am one what.
seriously, bloody shit. Its a different situation altogether please. What time did I wake up in the day, what time do I have to wake up nowadays?
I did in the end, but i fell asleep in the midst and continued after waking, gave up, slept around 3am, stoned the whole day at work. Sucked ttm please, esp since its training.
Its not up to standard (it never is anw) and daddy wanted to confiscate my phone once I got home tonight so I'd stay home over the weekend to pack. Damn rubbish, seriously.
Time and time again, I told them the mess is just cause I have no space. Give me more space, and it'll be a different story altogther. They refused. So, is it my freaking bloody damn problem? I dont even have enough space in my room for my school stuff alone. If I were to fill up all the cupboards with my school stuff, its not even enough. Don't I have other things too? Gosh. And they keep claiming I have alot of stuff that I don't need. Its only true to a limited extent, but if I don't have enough space, some of the stuff will remain undiscovered, cause at the end of day I'll have to clear the 'mess'. Seriously, how is it ever possible for the mess to be eradicated without giving me more space?
And while I was saying that I'm keeping my stuff until March just to make sure, they asked if I was going to retake the A's damn sarcastically.
Me: idk see how first, my A's reallydamn bad.
Mummy: aiya no excuse, that's what you always say. if you wanna retake you pay yourself.
Seriously, wth. Honestly speaking, I felt that apart from the MAJOR mind-breakdown for History, everything else was rather okay, I was prepared. How on earth is this the same as previously?
And honestly, I think that they're in no position to comment because they have absolutely no idea what I went through during that period. Not like they would sympathize with me if they knew, they'd just say too bad. I know them well enough. Even if they don't know me.
Touch wood, but come March and they say I deserved my History grade (if it's bad which I'm hoping its not), I'm so gonna flare up I swear.
I guess they will if its bad. They always say its my fault. Everything is my fault, really.
And, I'm really damn sick and tired of all these shit. Give me a break.Labels: freak; but thats life, rants.
|
|
blues clues.
I'm gonna die tmr, I'm bloody wide awake now. I almost fell asleep during training today, it was just uber boring. My eyelids were constantly at war with my brain, you get my drift.
Its been a long time since I felt this way.
Today felt like school all over again, just that it was a gazillion times worse. The content was uber foreign, and honestly, I don't have any other use for the knowledge.
I hope I survive tmr. 9am to 5.30pm, gah.
|
|
rainbow.
 During the reception after the Christmas service yst, some people were asking me how the next phase of my life's gonna be, and the most obvious thing was that I want to get into University. They asked how were the A's; I gave the same answer: quite bad. But honestly, during this period I never stopped believing in something: God is working out His plans. Cliche as it may sound, but yes. It became more obvious to me as the A's took place, and I found myself replying more on my faith than on my own strength alone. Things were just shouting out at me that perhaps I'm doing too much to get what I want, not what HE wants, and things that never happened before happened. In my entire educational 'career', this was the first episode whereby I cried after a paper and broke down in the midst of studying. Yes, I did feel stressed on other occasions, but this period was just exceptionally tough. Looking back, I still can't believe those two incidents actually took place. But no doubt, I also experienced refreshing and enlightening moments beyond my comprehension, and these moments spoke for themselves that I'm not alone in this battle. So.. Plans after the results? Honestly, I have no idea. I had this wacky idea to study History in Uni a while back. Up to now, I still have no idea why I had that thought. Cause honestly, it sounds uber ridiculous. Since I have no intention of joining MOE haha. Let's see what March 2011 will bring yeah. Good or bad, I'll just give thanks. (: Serene, if you're reading this, stop thinking about the negative things, look ahead. Have faith. He never fails :D Labels: reflections.
|
|
lights.
First day of work tmr, and I'm awfully nervous. I hope everything goes fine.
At least I know some people in my dept, and Char and me'll be at the same place! (Y)
Town after work tmr, yay! :D
For now, I need to shower and sleep.
G'night everyone!
|
|
showtime.
I just remembered that I start work at 10am tmr. And I'm still wide awake now.
Gosh.
I have no idea why it totally slipped my mind until I walked into the kitchen to grab some food.
I'm looking forward to tmr!
1. Last day of work (Y)
2. Christmas Service! :D
  Christmas was spent in bed, I woke up only after 4pm heh.
Work was hell, overly crowded shop and irritating customers who pull out shirts from the bottom of the pile and throw it back on top REPEATEDLY. Not to mention annoying customers who somehow or rather manage to get stacks of pants to land up behind the shelvings. Seriously, if you need help, ask, don't push the stock -.-"
I got a shock when i knelt down to arrange the pants during closing.
Seriously, I hope I fall asleep soon. :/
Otherwise, I'm screwed tmr. Like really really.
|
|
let down your hair.
Caught Rapunzel, after what seemed to be like eternity.
The 4 workmates were supposed to catch it tgt before work today, and Seri was still saying she could get her mummy's pass and get us free tickets at Cathay. But that stupid pig overslept, woke up after 4pm -.-"
We were supposed to meet at 1pm at Bishan, but Joey woke up at 1pm wts. In the end I trained down to NEX to meet the two of them. They felt damn bad about making me wait so they cabbed down to meet me! (:
Impromptu-ly decided to catch the 3D version, we got a shock when the 3 tickets cost $42. But it was worth it. The kids in the theater were uber cute, they kept trying to grab the floating lights when they 'passed by'! Cute maxx!
Stoned during work, and we kept going into the storeroom to slack and eat the chocolates hahaha. No one had any mood to do anything except slack lol.
I still can't believe Sunday's gonna be my last day, I'll miss everyone. All our rubbish, and the bitching sessions about the other workers, all the stupid names we give one another, all the times we'd report to work but slack outside and return on the dot to begin work, all the times Seri wants her smoke break, all the times we crave for KOI, and the list goes on. ):
Tentatively going for countdown with Joey, JiaYing and Seri, keeping my fingers crossed.
Its a good thing I live so near NEX, I can pop by anytime to visit them! :DLabels: its a good day.
|
|
fairy god-mother.
I haven't started work yet, but I alr have a slight dislike for my company.
Apart from the fact that the interviewer came more than 90mins late and made me super duper ultra mega late for work, the interviewer wrote down on my application form that I needed one week's notice to my current employer.
So, why on earth did they say that training had to start on the 27th of Dec? When my last day at G2000's technically 29th Dec. Eileen from the agency said she'd help me negotiate Starhub since I had a valid reason, but she called me this morning to say that its not possible for me not to go for the training, otherwise I'd be dropped from the job. Seriously, what rubbish is this?
Thank goodness I'm off on the 28th and 29th. And that I randomly agreed to take JiaYing's shift tonight cause she was damn tired, and I'm off, with nothing to do. Coincidentally, she's off on the 27th, and she returned the favour so everything's okay now.
Bleah. And that also means that I'd have worked for 15 days straight without off, beginning from the 17th omg. Cause I was off on the 20th but Charmaine, Brenda, Edwin and I tried out a job at some dessert stall in NEX, and I was supposed to be off today. I was supposed to be off next week too, but now..
Gah, I hope I survive.
This also means I can't go out with Michelle next week, and I can't have picnic lunch at Marina Barrage with Miss Liu, Vanessa, Constance, Yong Siong and Nina on the 31st anymore. Omg.
And adding in all the -ve remarks about my job via comments on my Facebook status, idk.
Now, I'm really really gonna miss my job at G2000. And all the awesome people. I love my job, apart from the occasionally anal Manager and 2nd-Store IC.
And I realized that many people actually take Circle Line. After closing yst, 5 of us boarded the train heading towards Marymount happily talking and teasing one another, and that was when I felt really sad about leaving.
Idk why they love making fun of me, hahaha. Everytime I go to work all dressed up, they'd say that I went dating, everytime I text after work, they'd say I'd be texting my boyfriend. Wts hahaha.
P.S. Charmaine, thanks for accompanying me these few days, I realized that I see you almost everyday. Thanks for the company! xoxo!
Oh, she delivered marshmellows to my work place yst cause I was craving for it but didn't have time to buy since I was running late, all thanks to the stupid contract-signing. When I walked to the storeroom to put it down, those having their break asked if it was from my boyfriend -.-" Labels: rants.
|
|
bright lights.
I GOT A NEW JOB! $9/HOUR, $7/HOUR FOR TRAINING. (Y)
W, I think you have psychic powers hahahaha.
mocha.infusion says:
eh i think by the time i make it to nex u are on ur nex job liao True enough, the person from the agency called me a while ago with the good news! :D
Thanks alot, W! Hahahaha.
That irritating person's damn happy now cause I have a bigger pay cheque, and he's under the assumption that it'll translate to a better treat. Tsk.
But that interview pissed me off big time. Scheduled at 4pm, but the interviewer turned up after 5.30pm. And I had to start work at 6pm. Ended up leaving the place at 6.10pm, tried to flag a cab. None, walked towards MRT station, managed to get one. Then, TRAFFIC JAM omg. A journey from Tai Seng to NEX cost $8.90 wth.
Up till now, idk why I cabbed. Esp since my Manager didn't really scold, cause I said I'd repay the time the next day. Sucks ttm omg. I'm damn broke now wth.
And I think smth was wrong with me yst. When I reached work, I was too lazy to change shoes. And I decided to wear my heels instead of flats. For some damn weird reason.
Me: Eh, can don't change shoe? I lazy sia.
Manager: Crazy, wear so high can walk meh?
Me: Can uh! After 2.5hours, I gave up. Plus I kept climbing the ladder omg.
I can tender my resignation later on, shiok. (Y)
But seriously, I'll miss the people working at G2000. Esp the PartTimers! ):
Charmaine Chung, go apply for the job please! They still need people, and we can work tgt too!Labels: HAPPY MEALS ARE FOR HAPPY GIRLS. LIKE JESSICA. ;D
|
|
in the night sky.
I don't have to be psychic to know that nothing good will emerge.
And yet I choose to carry on.
Often times, I stop and ask myself why I'm doing this.
After a long while of constant pondering, I admit defeat.
And I carry on.
 I guess this is the reason.
|
|
job-hunting.
 Jessica wants/needs a new job damn badly.
But honestly, I'm okay with anything for the time being, anything that allows me to earn more than $27.50 a day. And that's only for the time being, cause there's End of Season Sale going on now.
Trust me, ESS is pure madness.
For the past 2 days, I've been folding clothes like no one's business, cause customers are somehow inconsiderate enough to flick up the whole stack of shirts just to find the one they want. To the extent that a huge mountain of shirts greet me each time i arrive at the table, no matter how much folding I did previously. Plus, when I fold the shirts, I can't really put them back in their original pile cause the original piles are covered by a sea of shirts. So they'll end up in a neat stack, which will always metamorphosis into a messy pile, and its back to square one all over again.
Yst's crowd was way bigger than today's. Ironical huh, since today's a weekend.
BUT. Today's customers left a way bigger mess than yst. Gosh. Thank goodness there were more staff doing closing over at the male side today. (:
Previously, I thought folding polo tees were bad. Looking back, the polo-tees-mess is totally insignificant compared to the long-sleeved-shirt-mess.
For some weird reason, everyone seems to think I'm a Malay. Omg. First it was the staff. Today, customers.
I was assisting this group of ladies buying shirts for their husbands, and all along we were conversing in English.
After a while,
(in Mandarin)
Lady A: Eh, this colour not bad leh!
Lady B: Which one, this?
Lady A: Yup!
Lady B: Hmmmm
Me: If you want I can help you to get a new piece.
Lady A: HUH YOU CAN SPEAK MANDARIN?
Me: Uh, yar, I'm Chinese!
Lady A & B: I thought you were a Malay!
Lady C: Good thing you two didn't say anything bad about her.
-.-"
After a while, I went into the store room, and Linda was on her way out. Conversed in Mandarin and when I came out, this man asked me. "Oh you can speak Mandarin?"
GOSH.
Farlysa and Linda kept laughing when I told them about it wth. Hahaha.
Actually, if not for the uber short working hours and the exploitation, I might consider staying put. I'm having quite alot of fun with the people there, both FTs and PTs. No one believes I'm 18, wth ):
Anw, back to job hunting. I sent in resumes to Resorts World Sentosa and UnderWater World, I hope I get a reply soon. I regret not going for the RWS interview, they even asked me to go down but I didn't wanna go to some ulu place on my own.
Idk if I should apply for a diving position at UWW. I think the pay should be quite high? And I have the qualifications. But idk if I need a refresher course :/
Job-hunting at NEX with Charmaine & Brenda today was kinda good, just that the pay's generally around $5. Those with $6/hour requires commitment, and I'm clinging on to the hope that some of my previous resumes will be accepted.
For the time being, I'm gonna try out cashier-ing at this Desert Shop, starting pay of $5.50/hour cause I have cashier-ing experience. The pay for cashier's higher teehee. And the person-in-charge seems nice, she's willing to work around my weekend schedule cause I have Church on both evenings. If I'm attending Youth Service on Saturdays, that is. Haha.
She asked me to try out for one day on my off day, and she's even gonna pay me. Wow. And if I interpreted her China-accented Mandarin correctly, I'll usually work for about 7 hours a day? So thats $38.50 a day, until my pay increases. I hope it does anw XD
Plus I kinda like the working environment, alot of youths! Lets see how things go on Monday!
Charmaine and me are also going for this interview for some Western Bistro on Monday, the stupid guy didn't wanna divulge the pay when I called him up to inquire. Bleah.
I hope its good. I want money money. As much as I know Admin Work pays alot more, idk if I can stand facing the computer the entire day, not talking to people.
Cheryl keeps telling me she can totally imagine me working at Marble Slab Cremery, and I went there to inquire. There's some kinda height limit thing -.-"
Good thing Brenda and me passed. But the woman was just weird. She interviewed us and she ended up talking about education and how we should try to go overseas if we could, higher pay and all. Idk if its true. And she kept going on about how pretty the 3 of us were, especially Charmaine! Hahahaha. She told me I had nice eyes and nose, and asked if they were from my dad or my mum. I totally dk, hahaha.
She kinda scares me, plus its only $5/hour!
So, sorry Cheryl! Hahahaha.
(Shucks this is a damn long post. Haven't done this in a long while! XD)
I want a new job please! Admin, Retail, F&B, whatever. Gah.Labels: rants.
|
|
endless roadtrip.
Honestly, sometimes idk.
I look back and realize that there are ups and downs.
For some periods of time, we talk everyday, sometimes we don't talk for a stretch of time.
This isn't a solitary case, there're many cases like yours.
But y'know what, this somehow feels different. Sometimes, when we catch up, I feel as though things have changed. We're no longer the close friends we used to be, its as though I can't feel the close bond that once existed.
Or is it just me?
But sometimes, I just feel as though the both of us are hypocrites beneath the surface. We act nice to one another, but bitch about one another afterwards, some of our forms of address for one another have a signposting attached. Its as though those terms are used only when we need a favour.
Yes, both. I admit.
I really don't know. Its shouting out at me damn obviously that smth's wrong. Esp when I can't trust you enough to tell you some stuff.
Gah.
|
|
walking in a winter wonderland.
Girls talk today with Miss Liu and Vanessa today was fun!
But Miss Liu flew my kite THRICE! ):
Miss Liu, don't fly it for a forth time on the 31st alright?
Caught up over dinner at Fish & Co, proceeded to Starbucks to continue our gossip session.
It was nice sharing our secrets with one another (:
And catching up too! Esp with Miss Liu! Gosh I missed her alot alot alot!
Miss Liu, I still can't believe I told you about it! Haha but yupp, I'll be careful, don't worry! (:
Amazing how we can tell one another the secrets that we don't tell many people huh.
Love the two of you loads! ♥Labels: HAPPY MEALS ARE FOR HAPPY GIRLS. LIKE JESSICA. ;D
|
|
basketful of sunshine.
Announcement : The supplier of the WillRun 2010 shirts has screwed up again. No surprise actually.
So people like Mr Ong, Zafran and Waii Hoong who're always hounding me for the shirts, I'm sorry. And I have no idea when the shirts are coming, if they ever are.
Constantly asking me about the shirts ain't gonna make them arrive faster y'know. (Hint hint at Mr Ong HAHAHAHA)
Anw, my attempt at tanning failed BIG TIME, I didn't get tan at all. Wth. Nonetheless, I had a great time at Sentosa with the A Math buddies! ((: Labels: its a good day.
|
|
memories.
This time last year, I was having the time of my life in LiJiang.
And I miss this little boy from Nao Yao kindergarten! I was teaching him about shapes and he asked me to help him stick his stuff and colour the shapes for him in the end.
Cute maxxxx! :DLabels: SRGCE LiJiang (:
|
|
blues clues.
I'm seriously considering looking for a better job that's more well-paid, more fun and allows me to work longer hours.
4 hours a day is damn ridiculous, seriously. Why on earth did they post me to NEX when there're alr alot of full-timers and part-timers there?!?!?
Part-timers mainly work for 4 hours a day, with 2 off days a week on average. Which translates to a less than satisfactory paycheck.
And I freaking feel exploited. When I do closing, I have a hunch I'm only paid until 10pm. Which doesn't make sense since I usually knock off properly at 11pm.
On Thursday, my 2nd IC was nice enough to ask me to leave at 11pm since I was a part-timer. And one full-timer told me to just leave at 10pm, or finish your part and leave.
True enough, my Store IC told me to leave after I finished yst, but when I went to sign out, a full-timer asked me to ASSIST another person to replenish since it was getting late. Upon hearing that, she gave me a list of items to get from the storeroom, and while I was busy hunting for the items, SHE HAPPILY WENT TO CHANGE. Another part-timer saw, told me, and I immediately stopped. Wth, seriously.
Yes, the people there are nice, the full-timers are nice to me, they help me along the way and give you tips on how to slack on the sly. But that's besides the point.
Annoying customers are unavoidable, that I don't deny. But ignoring that, I still feel exploited. Its okay if my job belittles my qualifications, but it goes further by exploiting me and not giving me ample opportunities to earn.
Sucks ttm.Labels: rants.
|
|
hearts all over the world tonight.
I never knew wearing flats could make your legs hurt like hell. Esp your heels. I just found out that, the hard way. And when I mean wear, I mean for short periods of time like 3 hours. Gah. Some shoes really suck. Shoes should have a comfort detector, really. Now, I have to look for a new pair of shoes for work.
NEX is freaking damn huge omg. I still find it hard to believe that its just within walking distance from my house. Explored the place after work today with Marcia, and seriously, that place is just uber confusing. If I could rearrange the shops in NEX, I'd put all the food places tgt. Its freaking confusing, all the eateries are all over the mall, gah.
Initially, we kinda decided on Sushi Teh, then when I looked at the Level Directory, I suddenly felt like eating at Fish & Co. But y'know what the awesome thing is? Its not opened yet -.-"
Mentioning Fish & Co reminds me of WOWS, and how I told him 'Fish & Co' when he asked what's on the menu (for consult). Hahahaha retarded max, I was uber highhhhh that day haha. Anw, I don't owe him Fish & Co, do I? Shucks, I can't rmb. And I bet he can't too hahah.
We were like two bimbos in Etude House I swear, hahaha. I wanted to buy nail polish for Prom, but my finger nails were painted. So, we used the remover in the shop to clean the polish off all ten fingers of mine, only to replace them with colours from the shop. Omg, its just damn retarded, seriously. Heh.
OH AND I MET MISS TAN CHYE I AT SUSHI TEH! :D
Btw, some smart girl packed all her paper and shipped it off to Australia, and she had to buy paper today to make birthday cards.
Marcia, I wonder who's the super duper ultra mega uber smart person huh! Hahahaha.
I'll miss you when you leave on the 8th! ):
Its damn amazing that we're still in touch after leaving primary school! Don't forget me after you settle down in Perth okay!
Love you loads girl! :D
Photos up after she uploads them! Some smart person's dad shipped all the camera memory cards to Australia too, so now there's only space for 20 pics in the camera. Hahaha I know where the genes came from alr!
Anw, work's kinda sian at times, esp when there's no one in the shop and you end up walking around aimlessly. Not that its nice when you have many people in the shop, cause sometimes so many people ask you for this and that, to the extent that some slips your mind. Its worse when you can't seem to find the stock in the store. Bleah.
At least my Store-in-charge's pretty nice! ((:
Just that I have no idea what time I'm working tmr, she said she'd text me later. And it doesn't help that I'm meeting Sky to buy his Prom stuff, and maybe Jasmine for dinner, if i'm not working that late. Rawr.
Just yst, I realized that men's clothes are uber nice. Just look at the pants and all, plus the variations of shirts. At least that's something for me to do when there're no customers around and I have nothing to do, lol.
SRGCE-ians, please come back soon. Esp Regina Koh! I miss you loadssssss! The night before she flew off, I wanted to text her a long long text. And my phone had to restart THRICE, each time when I was on my 6th or 7th text. The best part? It wasn't saved in drafts, idk why. Sucks ttm please. Stupid phone.
At least I woke up just in time to text her until she took off! :D despite falling asleep only 3 hours before. Plus, its damn hard for me to wake up that early on my own, Regina can testify to that.
So darling, see how much you mean to me now? Teehee.
That was my first day of work too, and it sucked that there isn't anyone I can text when I'm boredddd ):
Text without replies, yeah I can do that, but its sadd. Hurry come back from Yangshuo so you can reply my texts kk haha. Anw, texting someone knowing they won't reply's fun! Its like a second Twitter, just that there's no character limit and you can add personal stuff in there! (:
 7th Dec, come quickly please! Plus its the day Mich comes back too! And the day I get my first paycheck. Awesome or what? :D
I just realized that 7 represents perfection. And in this case, 7th Dec is indeed a perfect day (Y)
Labels: its a good day.
|
|
